One of the most important aspects of the Cambodia trip from a big picture perspective was the relationship-building time we had with two government officials. While we did carry out some business during the two meetings, each of which lasted for two hours, most of the time was devoted to building and deepening relationships. Without relationships leadership is nothing more than a matter of position. John Maxwell reminded us a long time ago, when he outlined his five levels of leadership that the lowest level is the “positional” level. At this level the followers follow only because the leader has positional authority. For example, I am a pastor, but if my only authority in a person’s life is because I hold that position, I won’t hold much influence.
During the Cambodia trip we met with the new governor of the Bantay Meanchey Province. The key word is “new” governor. We already had a relationship with the previous governor, and are in the process of helping develop programs in the nine school districts of the province that will ensure better futures for the children and young people who attend the schools there. This is vital and far-reaching work. We need the governor’s support and help. Far more important, we want the governor’s friendship and goodwill. All true growth between people and even nations travels a relational bridge. That’s why Maxwell’s second level of leadership is the “relational” level. At the relational level of leadership the follower follows the leader or receives influence from the leader, because of the personal connection between the two. The follower moves from following because he or she has to, because he or she wants to follow. There is a like factor in the relationship.
Of course, leaders must genuinely want to be in relationship with those they lead, and as in the case of our relationship with the deputy prime minister and governor there is more of a peer relationship than a leader-follower relationship. Even so, relationship comes before ministry. If you’re thinking, “I lead a business, so this doesn’t apply to me, I would think again.” After all, if you lead a work group, or even the executive team at your work, you won’t accomplish a great deal if those you lead see you only from a positional level of leadership. They will do what they have to do to follow your direction, but they may not like it. They certainly won’t have an incentive to want to follow your direction.
Relationships are always vital to us as leaders, because we are leading people not objects. When we care about those we lead they know it. They also know when we don’t. The synergy that comes when we are leading people we know and care about and the same is true of them for us means far better results than can ever be achieved by focusing on the task alone. Always remember: Relationship before ministry.
Here’s to leading better, but deepening relationships–today!