Saying Yes and Saying No – Part 2

As I send at the end of yesterday’s post, today we’re going to look at the yes’s we need to say in our lives. While each yes we say will bring with it a corresponding no or no’s, we’re going to emphasize the necessary yes’s right now. What is the most important yes you need to make in your life right now? What is the one thing you need to do that will increase your effectiveness as a leader, or your value as an employer or employee, or your faithfulness as a spouse, parent or child? I know that’s a big question, but sometimes we need to ask ourselves big questions.

As I’ve reflected on that question over the past several couple of months now, the single most important yes I have needed to say, and I need to say it over and over again is yes to having God be first in my life. You may not believe in God. You may not believe that Jesus Christ is God, but I do. He said, “Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all the things you need will be added to you.” (See Matthew 6:33) I have known that statement since I was a child. I have believed that statement is true since I was a child. Yet, when I wake up in the morning I don’t always say yes to it. I don’t always live as if seeking God’s kingdom and His righteousness is the first priority of my life.

I need to say yes to that reality, because when I do, I know what else to say yes and no to in my life. Each of us needs a frame of reference, a worldview, a culture out of which we live and move and have our being. We have many from which to choose, but I have chosen to say yes to a biblical worldview. In that worldview God is always the first yes. From that yes, I may move forward in every area of my life: the spiritual, physical, emotional, and so on. When I say yes to God I orient my calendar and checkbook accordingly. In other words, I schedule my time and spend my money with the realization that it isn’t my time and my money. It all belongs to God.

You may not believe that. I do. Therefore, my yes’s must all stem from that reality. What is your worldview? What frame of reference is your “stake in the ground,” from which you cannot be moved? Do you have one? Saying yes starts with responding to those key questions, because until we know who we are, and I would add “whose” we are, we will have a challenging time saying yes to what matters. We won’t know what matters until we have said our primal yes to whomever or whatever it is that matters most in our lives. I would contend we are all ultimately better off when God is our first yes. That is my frame of reference.

Whatever your frame of reference, in order to get the most out of life as you understand it, saying your yes’s in a way that is consistent will bring the most satisfaction, or ought to do so. The reason I say it ought to do so, is internal consistency or congruence is the best position from which to live our lives. The challenge is the biblical worldview contends it is the superior worldview and we won’t find ultimate identity, destiny or purpose in our lives until we recognize that God has created us and revealed our identity, destiny and purpose through His Son, Jesus Christ. You don’t have to believe that, but I pray you will if you don’t.

I don’t pray it because I get a reward if you do, but because you do. You will have the potential to live your yes’s in a way that matters for today and for eternity. Let me conclude this post by saying each of us will decide on our “stake in the ground.” It may be following Jesus and therefore seeking first God’s Kingdom and righteousness. It may be following a religion to bring order and purpose. It may be pursuing fame and fortune, or it may be just going with the flow.

My guess is if your purpose is to go with the flow, you won’t have just stumbled across my blog and won’t be joining us on a regular basis. If your purpose is to pursue fame and fortune, you will find much here of value when it comes to the leadership skills and pursuits that will help you attain your goals. If you are following a religious path to order and bring purpose to your life, you will find much of value here, too. But if you are open to the truth that there is one God, who created all that exists, and that He has a Son, named Jesus, who lived, died, rose again and returned to heaven from which He sent His Spirit to empower our lives on a daily basis, your yes’s will gain their greatest power.

I believe everyone ought to be challenged by choice. While I believe Jesus Christ is Savior and Lord of all, and that truth doesn’t require you or me to believe it in order for it to be true, until we believe in Him we will pursue another yes in our lives. In any case, saying yes moves us from where we are to a different place over time. The “big” yes in our lives will determine all our other yes’s, which is why I’ve invested so much time on it today. Tomorrow, we’ll consider why no is also a critical word and action for our leadership.

Here’s to leading better by anchoring ourselves in one, ultimate yes, in order to give meaning and purpose to our lives and leadership–today!

Saying Yes and Saying No – Part 1

Next weekend we are going to be launching the Yes! Initiative at New Life, the church I serve as lead pastor. The initiative will be a three year process  to increase our understanding of generosity and to commit to giving the funds necessary to construct a Children’s Nurture and Discipleship building at New Life. To coincide with that launch we’re launching a five-week message series titled: Just Say Yes! I’ve already invested much time and prayer into planning and preparing for the process and the message series. As I’ve been preparing, I’ve also been working through Michael Hyatt’s Free to Focus. Something he said in the series struck me as simple yet profound: The two most important words for increasing productivity are yes and no.

Yes and no. So many times, we focus on saying yes. Indeed, in order for us to start any new endeavor in our lives we must say yes. After all, until we make a commitment to get from where we are to where we want to be, which will mean saying yes, we will never get there. At the same time, I am realizing with Hyatt’s help that we will also need to say no. Every time we say yes to one thing we are saying no to something else. For example, if Nancy and I want to give money to the Yes! Initiative (and we do), then we will say yes to allocating funds from our income and or savings to do so. In the moment we say yes to that, we will be saying no to using those funds for any other purpose.

The importance of understanding that every yes also means at least one no cannot be overstated if we are going to be the most effective leaders possible. All too often, folks tell us we need to be positive; we need to say yes to being and doing more in our lives, if we want to be all we can be. I tend to agree with such thinking. It sounds right and it feels good. Yet we must challenge such thinking, because it can trap us into making one or more new commitments in our lives when we have neither the margin of time or money to fulfill them.

Let’s use a simple example: you want to become more physically fit. (Doesn’t nearly everyone?) What yes or yes’s will you need to say in order to do so? You may need to say yes to a new eating plan. You will probably need to say yes to a new or adjusted exercise plan. That will be a great start, but where will you get the time for your exercise plan, and what no’s will your new eating plan require? After all, we may exercise for an hour every day, but if we consume a half dozen glazed donuts afterward, we have just said no to becoming more physically fit.

When we start to think in terms of saying yes to one opportunity meaning saying no to others, we will gain a fuller understanding of how to move forward in every area of our lives and leadership. In order to start, though, we need to do what we’ve talked about from day one of this blog: examine our lives. We need to ask ourselves what do I really want to accomplish? Hopefully, we’ve already developed a life plan; we’ve already been working on life management, and we’ve already created some margin in our lives when it comes to time and money. If you haven’t done any of those things, then you can review the blog history and you’ll find posts about each of these important steps in examining our lives and leadership and then planning to become who we aspire to be.

Wherever you are right now in your life planning, life management and margin understanding the implications of saying yes and no, and particularly that anytime we say yes we are also saying no will be a giant step forward in accomplishing your goals and plans. I wanted to introduce this important idea today, and then tomorrow and the next day consider the yes’s and no’s of our lives separately, although we’ll understand that this is an artificial separation, since every time we say yes, we’re also saying no. Why not take ten minutes right now to consider the most recent yes’s and no’s you’ve said in your life and whether you considered the no’s that came with the yes’s and the yes’s that came with the no’s. (If that’s confusing, suffice it to say that every time you said yes recently you were also saying no to something, and every time you said no to one thing you were saying yes to something else.)

Here’s to leading better by understanding the implications of saying yes and no for our leadership–today!

Who Are You Mentoring?

One of the most important matters for a leader to undertake is mentoring. So who are you mentoring? Is there someone(s) you are investing in on a regular basis, sharing your wisdom and expertise, so when your run as a leader is over your leadership influence will continue? If you’re a young leader, you may not think you need to consider mentoring, because you have plenty of time. That kind of thinking is short-sighted at best, and will ensure your influence does not continue beyond your lifetime. It’s never too early to start mentoring. After all, regardless of our age, we don’t know how long we have left to lead, and mentor others, right? None of us is given a guarantee when it comes to longevity.

Over the years I have spoken with many people about the need for all of us to have an accountability partner and to mentor others. Depending on our age, we may also need to have a mentor ourselves. That way someone is investing in us, someone is holding us accountable for our leadership and growth and we are investing in someone in the next generation. Leadership is a team effort, and that not only applies to the importance of leading through teams, but the importance of investing in future generations of leaders, and investing in our own sustainability as leaders.

I realize that last paragraph covered a lot of territory, but unless we are intentional about our own growth and accountability, we may not be leaders long enough to become effective mentors for others. Each of us must invest in our own life and well-being intentionally or risk forfeiting our leadership too soon. When we are investing in our own lives and leadership, we are excellent candidates to invest in the lives of other potential leaders. After all, a good example is a great place to start when it comes to mentoring. Young leaders need role models at least as much as they need someone to give them good information. Good information is available from a plethora of sources, but faithful role models aren’t as easy to find.

You may have heard the old saw: good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions. I bring it up here, because when I say young leaders need good role models, I don’t mean perfect role models. Sometimes what we bring to the table as mentors is “experience.” We have made bad decisions, and when we mentor others we can steer them away from those, if they’ll listen. In my experience, sometimes a young leader hears our stories about what we did wrong, nods his head in agreement, and then goes out and does the very same thing we told him sidetracked us. The role of a mentor is not to dictate another’s behavior, but to inform it.

How do you choose a person to mentor? You may already have someone in mind, but have been reticent to volunteer, because it may not seem humble to do so. The person you’re considering may be in need of a mentor, and may be afraid to ask. You’re stepping forward and volunteering to mentor in that situation, may be the very thing the young leader was desiring. Or not. The person may say, “No thanks.” That’s the danger every leader has when offering to help or lead another. We need to be okay with that. Our having a desire to mentor another doesn’t always mean the other wants to be mentored. If you have considered who you would be equipped to mentor, prayed about it, and then make the ask, whether the response is a yes or a no, you have done your part.

At the same time, a young leader may come to you and ask you to be his or her mentor. In those situations, you need to consider the investment it will take in terms of your time, effort and energy before saying yes. Just as a prospective mentor may say no to us, we need to be able to say no at times. I would say the times we need to say no is when the prospective mentor is asking us more out of a personal relationship than out of a “match” when it comes to what he or she needs in a mentor. Being a mentor means different things to different people, but a mentor ought at least to have experience and expertise in the area of the prospective mentor’s chosen vocation. We also need to consider how many people we can mentor effectively given our current life season and situation.

Once you have found the younger leader to mentor, be sure to establish some ground rules around such matters as how often, what time of day and where you’ll be meeting. Flexibility may be required depending on your schedules, but the more regular and routine the relationship becomes, the more likely it is to be consistent and mutually beneficial. Remember that mentoring is more than being a friend. Be clear about that. While you may become friends, the goal is to build into the person’s life, to make them more effective leaders than they are today. Sometimes that means critiquing what they are doing. Be clear that you will never do that with the intent to hurt feelings, but sometimes that may occur.

I have mentored many young leaders over the years, and am about to enter a new mentoring relationship this week. I have found the experiences to be mutually beneficial. I must continue to learn and grow myself if I am to offer benefit to the one(s) I’m mentoring. You will experience the same thing as you invest intentionally in younger leaders if you haven’t done so before. Remember that one of the greatest blessings of being a leader is to equip the next generation of leaders to follow after you’re leadership has ended. We are all stewards of our gifts, skills, time and leadership. I hope you’ll make the commitment to mentor a younger leader if you haven’t yet done so, and that you’ll continue to be a mentor if you already are one.

Here’s to leading better by entering a mentoring relationship–today (or in the near future)!

Half Measures…

Every Tuesday afternoon I lead a Bible Study at a half-way house for men who are in recovery for alcohol and other drug addiction. Over the years, I have learned some of the recovery language, and one of my favorite expressions is “Half measures have availed me nothing.” The reason I find that expression so helpful is I have often majored in half measures. I have attempted to do something, but without giving it my best, without being all in as the saying goes. When we offer half measures as leaders even when we “win” we lose.

I say that because when we “win” while offering half measures, the win is hollow. Perhaps we’ve reached our production quota, or the message when well, or others are happy with our performance. The problem is we know deep inside, or maybe quite close to the surface that we could have done better, and would have done better if we had given our whole self into the effort. It’s so easy to default to half measures in life, because we have so much to do that we can’t do everything well. We can’t give full measures to everything, right?

It all depends on what everything includes. If you and I attempt to do everything, then we will certainly default to half measures, because we will become overwhelmed quite quickly. That’s why we must examine our lives and ask ourselves what is important, truly important. If we compile a list of most important activities in life it cannot contain 100 items. After all, while there may be 100 items that are important, they can’t all be most important. When we attempt to do everything we will certainly fail, and feel miserable in the process, if we are leaders. Leaders have a drive to succeed.

The challenge is when we don’t attempt to do everything we can also feel like failures, right? We think if we’re leaders, truly leaders, we will be able to do more than everyone else. But the opposite is the truth. If we are truly leaders, we will learn the handful of things that are most important and pursue them with an all in attitude. Then when we succeed, we will know that it is sustainable success.

What about all the things we can’t do, when we narrow our focus? So, we get over half measuring everything, because we’re doing a handful of things with excellence, but what about everything we’re no longer doing? Truth be told, we ought not to have been doing most of it in the first place. The other activities that are important to the success of the team, or business, or family or organization must be delegated to others on the team. Leaders sometimes have problems with letting go of activities, because we’re afraid someone else won’t do it as well as we would. (Other leaders, insecure ones, won’t let go of activities, because they’re afraid someone else will do them as well or better than we would. That’s a post for another day.)

The key is when I focus on the handful of highest leverage activities, I can give full measures to them, and I won’t be in the position of half measuring everything and feeling like a failure. Please, understand the handful of high leverage activities will include personal care, what I call Life Management, and what Michael Hyatt calls the five “R’s” (I’ve written about both in previous posts.) For example, each of us needs a certain level of exercise or physical activity to remain healthy. That takes time, but such time used is not “spent” it’s “invested.” Make sure when you sit down to consider the handful of activities to which you must give full measure effort, you include the personal as well as the professional area of your life.

Remember, if you’re consistently finding yourself half measuring your life, you can be sure in the end it will avail you nothing. Take some time today to consider what you need to emphasize and what you need to eliminate and delegate in order to become the best leader you can be.

Here’s to leading better by giving full measure to a handful of emphases–today!

Leadership and Self-Deception

While on the flight home from Cambodia about a month ago, I read a book titled Leadership and Self-Deception by the Abridger Institute. The book has been transformative in my life. The basic premise of the book is that we are all self-deceived far more often than we think and when we are we will never function effectively as leaders. The book calls being self-deceived being “in the box.” When we’re in the box, we tend to exchange the corporate results of our organization, church, business or family for the single result of self-justification. Put simply: when I am self-deceived my major objective is to justify my thinking and behavior to make me right and everyone else wrong.

Until I read the book, I didn’t realize how easy it is to betray ourselves and thus fall into self-deception. The book is presented in the format of many of Patrick Lencione’s books, with a “fable” being the basis of the book. In Leadership and Self-Deception the fable is about a man who recently took a job at a new company, and is required to go through training with “Bud.” Bud is a master of presenting the concept of self-deception, because he was once a self-deceived leader himself, and as with all of us, is still working at staying “out of the box.”

For our purposes, let’s use one of the examples Bud offered in the book to see how easy it is to betray ourselves and then to move into self-deception. Bud offered the example of a time when he and his wife had an infant. In the middle of the night, Bud woke up to the cries of the baby. His feeling was, “I ought to go take care of the baby.” But instead of acting on the feeling, Bud betrayed the feeling and waited. For what? We all know, right? He waited for his wife to wake up and take care of the baby. As he lay there pretending to be asleep and not acting on his impulse to care for his son, Bud started moving to self-betrayal. Here’s how it worked: Bud thought something like this, “I’ve been working really hard, and I have an important meeting tomorrow. I need my rest. My wife doesn’t have anything that urgent to do. In fact, she’s actually rather lazy. She’s not that great a wife, and I am a great husband and father, because I work so hard to provide for us.”

Do you see what Bud did? He inflated his own goodness and magnified his wife’s flaws. He even invented a few flaws. That’s what we do when we’re in the box. We inflate our own value and devalue others. Bud’s definition of being in the box is when we treat others as objects and not as people. The book offers explanations of how we get in the box, how we get out of the box and how we stay out of the box. While it’s a fairly quick read, I’ve gone through it twice, because it’s principles are immediately applicable. Any time I start to justify myself when I’m thinking about someone else, I ask whether I’m self-justifying in order to make myself seem better than I am. If so, I realize I’m either in the box or moving there.

After that it’s a simple–not necessarily easy–but simple process of thinking through the steps necessary to treat the person as a person and to stop the self-justifying behavior. That does two important things: 1) it gets me focusing on the true results I’m working toward instead of working toward self-justification; and 2) it gets me thinking about the person in question as a person and not as an object. I find myself checking my motivations more often than in the past, and when I’m moving toward or am already in the box, I can get out much more quickly. Indeed, I was often in the box toward folks without recognizing it all.

One more important truth from the book is that we can be out of the box toward some people and in the box toward others. It isn’t an all or nothing matter. We must relate to every person as individual people. We either value them as a people or we devalue them as objects. I would encourage you to pick up a copy of Leadership and Self-Deception or listen to it on Audible. It’s worth far more than the purchase price. If you operate from a Christian worldview as I do, you will notice that the book is not from a Christian frame of reference. What I’ve noticed is I’ve inserted the concepts of sin and grace into my application of the principles and have found the book’s theses even more helpful.

Here’s to leading better by getting out of the box–today!

Self-Leadership–Part 6: Managing Energy Through Reflection

As we start a new week, we’re finishing the series on self-leadership, as we turn to the fifth of Michael Hyatt’s five “R’s” of managing our energy. They are: Rest, Refreshment, Recreation, Relationship and Reflection. If you missed the previous five posts, you may want to read them to get the background for these posts on self-leadership as well as to understand Hyatt’s basic premise that we can’t manage time, because it’s a fixed resource, while our energy is manageable and will determine the level of our productivity over time.

Reflection is a powerful component of self-leadership. After all, the unexamined life is not worth living, as our friend Socrates reminded us millennia ago. Reflection may include many aspects. It may simply be stopping to look back over the previous week or month, and asking ourselves whether we led to the best of our ability, whether we managed our energy well, and thus were more productive than in previous weeks or months. We may ask ourselves whether we were faithful to our personal and corporate visions. Many reflection questions may be asked, and when we’re honest in our responses, we can make adjustments so we will be more effective in the present and into the future.

Another component of reflection is meditation and or prayer. While many definitions exist for both words, as I’m using them, meditation is reflecting on Scripture, or other biblical truth in order to seat those truths in our minds and wills. Prayer is communicating with God, and an important aspect of that communication is listening as well as talking. While some of you may not believe in God, or at least not the God of the Bible who reveals Himself most clearly through Jesus Christ, taking the time to meditate and pray is a significant part of reflection for those of us who are people of faith. I encourage you to consider this aspect in your self-leadership, because it is difficult to lead if we don’t have an anchor for our lives.

As leaders, we need to reflect on every aspect of our lives, the first four “R’s” offer us opportunities for reflection. Are we getting enough rest to be as effective as we can be? When it comes to refreshment, are we eating and drinking the right things? Do our bodies demonstrate that? Are we exercising and playing in appropriate amounts, neither too little nor too much? How are our significant relationships doing? Are we investing enough time in making sure they are healthy and growing? Again, the answers to these questions will help us to see where we need to make adjustments in our lives. Unless we stop to reflect, we will not be able to lead effectively and we certainly won’t be as productive as we can be over the long haul.

Self-leadership helps us understand what we need to be and do in order to be the public leaders we are called and created to be. Taking the time to care for ourselves is vital. When I was in Boy Scouts and took the lifesaving merit badge I learned the first rule of lifesaving: Save yourself first. If we aren’t healthy and growing ourselves, we won’t be able to lead others.

Here’s to leading better by taking time to reflect–today!

Self Leadership–Part 5: Managing Energy Through Relationships

We all have relationships that drain energy from us, and thankfully those that add energy, too. As we continue looking at Michael Hyatt’s five “R’s” as a way of examining our self-leadership, today we turn to the fourth “R”: Relationships. (If you’ve missed the previous posts on this topic, you’ll want to read them, but as a quick review, the Michael Hyatt contends as we seek to lead ourselves to be more productive, we can’t manage time, because it is a fixed resource. What we can manage is our energy. We do that through effective management of the five “R’s”: Rest, Refreshment, Recreation, Relationships and Reflection.)

Relationships whether personal or business certainly have the potential to build or destroy energy in our lives, don’t they? When our relationships are going well, we not only have greater energy, but greater peace and an overall sense of well-being. When we go through tough times, but our significant relationships are solid, those storms are much easier to weather than when we go through the same situations, but our relationships are draining.

One of the most important comments Hyatt makes in his consideration of relationships is that we are human beings not human doings. While we may jump to activity first in our lives, or at least be prone to do so, all activity is more meaningful in relationship and community. For example, I have taken this week as vacation. When I originally scheduled it, Nancy and I were planning to take a trip to the New England states. Over this year though, Nancy has decided that we ought to finish our basement before Christmas so we can have the staff Christmas party there. I told her a couple of weeks ago, that if that were going to happen, I needed to work in the basement on vacation instead of traveling.

Both activities have merit, but working in the basement doesn’t seem to lend itself to building meaningful relationships. If all I did was work in the basement by myself it wouldn’t have built relationships, so each day we took some time and did something fun together. It served to build energy in the recreation area as well as the relationship area. We went out to dinner together on Monday. We went to dinner and a Pirates’ game on Tuesday. We took some friends out to dinner on Wednesday, and last night we stayed home and dreamed about what the basement is going to look like, and how we’re going to use the various areas once it’s finished.

While most of the week I worked on the basement, I also took time to build my relationship with God and Nancy, and even squeezed in an evening with friends. As with every one of the five “R’s” intentionality is the key to success. Self Leadership is about intentionality–planning our work (or play) and working our plans. As we do that our lives gain energy. I must say that while I have worked hard all week, I am more energized now than I was when the week started. Taking a break from the routine of daily work has added energy. I’ve rested more than usual, and eaten better over all, which has been a challenge since we’ve eaten out three evenings. While I didn’t exercise as in do a P90X workout or ride my exercise bike, the work in the basement has provided both aerobic and strength building activity. (I even dropped a couple of pounds.)

So, what are you doing to build your meaningful personal and work relationships these days? Are you being intentional? If you’re married do you have your spouse in your schedule? Some contend all we need to do is invest a little quality time with the significant people in our lives to build relationships. In my experience, it takes a quantity of time to build quality time. My evenings with Nancy have been good, and overall we have invested more time together than we typically get to have. The rejuvenating effects of intentional rest, refreshment, recreation, relationships and reflection (more about that on Monday) are essential for us if we’re go to be healthy over the long haul.

Have a great weekend, and we’ll conclude our consideration of self leadership on Monday. In the meantime, here’s to leading better by investing in our important relationships–today!

 

Self-Leadership – Part 4: Managing Energy Once More

A quick review for those who haven’t been following this week’s posts on Self-Leadership: The past couple of days we’ve been looking at Michael Hyatt’s five “R’s” of managing energy. Hyatt contends that we can’t ultimately manage time, because it’s a fixed resource, but we can manage our energy, and to do so, we must use the five “R’s” effectively. The five “R’s” parallel the seven principles of Life Management, which I introduced back in July. The five “R’s” included: Rest, Refreshment, Recreation, Relationships, and Reflection.

Today, we turn to Recreation. For Hyatt recreation includes exercise and play. Once again, Hyatt doesn’t break any new ground when he talks about exercise, noting that we need exercise that addresses the aerobic, strength-building, flexibility and balance areas of our bodies. It is a helpful reminder, though, when we’re talking about energy to focus on exercise, because while it seems that exercise would deplete our energy, it actually builds energy over time. Healthy and fit bodies have more energy than those that are weak and out of shape.

Once again, I have experienced this personally both in practicing healthy exercise patterns and in not practicing them. For my entire adult life, I have let the pendulum swing back and forth in this area. To give an example of the extremes to which the pendulum has swung, ten years ago I was so out of shape that I could only “run” an 1/8 of a mile, so I decided to do something about it. Six months later I ran in, and completed, the Cleveland Marathon. Over that time my weight went from about 215 pounds to 180 pounds. I felt better than I had in years. Over the ensuing years, I continued running for a while, then after an injury swam a mile a day for a year or so. Following that, I “took a break,” which is a euphemism for saying I didn’t exercise regularly for six months. Then I started P90X and over the next two years completed P90X twice, P90X2  and P90X3.

The point here is that exercise is part of Recreation, which is part of self leadership. What is your routine? Do you exercise regularly? Do you swing back and forth from maintaining an exercise regimen to not doing so? In order to maintain the energy we need to live productive lives, and particularly to do so as leaders, we need to include exercise in our daily schedule.

Hyatt adds play to recreation, which I found both interesting and helpful. After all, as the old saying goes, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” We do need to play, to take time to have fun with our spouses, our families and with friends. The other night Nancy and I went to the Pirates’ game. While the game itself was a disappointment, we enjoyed the evening together, as well as with those who sat around us. A couple from Wisconsin, who were there to root for the Chicago Cubs, provided an evening of light-hearted jabbing back and forth. The great thing about fun is it doesn’t have to be expensive. We can play a board game with our family, or get together with friends to watch a free concert in a local park during the summer months.

Hyatt points out that recreation is intended to re-create us, and when we maintain appropriate levels of exercise and play that’s precisely what happens. Our bodies respond with greater health, our attitudes grow more positive and our overall demeanor becomes more positive. Recreation is definitely an energizer when we include it regularly in our lives, so if we want to be great leaders, it’s important to include it as a priority in our lives.

Here’s to leading better by including recreation–exercise and play–in our lives–today!

Self Leadership – Part 3:

Let’s pick up where we left off yesterday with considering how we practice self-care through practicing the rejuvenating principles of the five “R’s” as presented by Michael Hyatt. In case you missed yesterday’s post, the five “R’s” are: Rest, Refreshment, Recreation, Relationships and Reflection. I compared these five “R’s” to my seven principles of Life Management yesterday, and if you want to see the parallels, you can read or reread yesterday’s post. Remember, too, Hyatt’s premise is we can’t manage time, because it is a fixed reality. What we can manage is our energy.  Through practicing the five “R’s” effectively, we increase our overall energy, which allows us to use our time optimally, and increase our overall productivity.

Let’s look at Hyatt’s second “R”: Refreshment. Hyatt uses the word refreshment to refer to food and drink. It is one of the three aspects of physical care in my seven principles of Life Management. Hyatt points out that he is neither a dietician nor a nutrition and that hundreds of plans for proper eating are out there. He points out a few simple truths when it comes to Refreshment: 1) We need to reduce our intake of high glycemic carbohydrates such as bread, pasta, potatoes and processed foods containing high fructose corn syrup and processed sugar; 2) We need to increase our intake of low glycemic carbohydrates such as legumes, most vegetables, sweet potatoes, and rice; 3) we need to get our protein from meats that have been grilled rather than fried, or coated with high glycemic carbohydrates; and 4) we need to drink a lot of water. Hyatt recommends drinking half the number of ounces of water as your weight in pounds each day. (For example: if you weigh 200 pounds, you need to drink 100 ounces of water.)

None of this is news to anyone who has been practicing even a modicum of self leadership in the area of “Refreshment.” As with Hyatt’s advice concerning rest, there is nothing groundbreaking here. This is common sense advice, we all know, but few practice. I have gone through seasons in my adult life when I practiced Life Management effectively in all seven areas, and in those seasons my energy was high and my effectiveness increased. Certainly, when we rest well on a regular basis, getting enough sleep each night, and taking regular brief naps during the day, and practice eating healthy foods and staying hydrated through drinking water, our energy and productivity will increase. That is common sense.

It is also effective self leadership. the challenge is to do what we know to do, isn’t it? None of us can disagree that it is effective self leadership to rest enough and eat well, but how many of us do it? For many years, I have focused on the challenge of discipline. I know what to do, but I’m not disciplined enough to do it. Hyatt has a response to such thinking. He calls it self-defeating thinking. After all, if I say, “I know what I need to do, but I’m not disciplined enough to do it,” then I’m saying I am going to fail at self-leadership. Hyatt points out that we need to stop seeing practicing these rejuvenating activities as a discipline to be exercised. They are rather freedom producing behaviors. They free us to live energized, productive lives.

For me the difference in those two perspectives is huge. After all, when I’m telling myself I don’t want to practice the discipline I “have” to practice in order to be healthy and effective as a leader, I’m convincing myself that it’s a battle I am eventually going to lose. When I see those activities as stepping stones to greater self leadership, greater health, effectiveness and productivity it makes a difference. 3,000 years ago, King Solomon of Israel said, “As a man thinks in his heart so is he.” How we think whether men or women, how we see ourselves, becomes what we are.

I’ve been taking Hyatt’s approach to self leadership over the past several days, and I can already sense the difference. Rather than thinking about my lack of discipline, I’ve been thinking about the freedom I’m going to experience when my energy level increases, when I’m back at my old “playing weight,” and when my key relationships are stronger, including my relationship with God. As we consider self leadership, managing our energy becomes a major factor in seeing ourselves grow. While each of us is unique, and varying personalities may have a different response to the concept of energy management as opposed to time management, I hope this framework helps you to become more effective in your own self leadership

Tomorrow, we’ll take a look at another of Hyatt’s means of managing our energy, so we will become more effective at using our time and more productive in our lives.

Here’s to leading better by using the refreshment of food and drink effectively–today!

Self-Leadership–Part 1: A Personal Vision

It was probably John Maxwell who said, “All leadership starts with self-leadership.” Whoever said it was right. After all, how will you and I ever lead anyone else if we can’t lead ourselves? When we get out of the bed in the morning, or perhaps before we even get out of bed in the morning, we must understand the day ahead will be filled with opportunities to fulfill our personal vision and the corporate vision over which we are responsible for leadership.

What is a personal vision? As with all visions it is a picture of a preferred future. My personal vision includes a glimpse of the corporate vision of New Life, but it extends into the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual realms of my life. I am a follower of Jesus, so my worldview comes from the Bible. That worldview includes an understanding that each human being consists of three parts: body, soul and spirit. The body is physical. The soul incorporates the mind, the emotions and the will. The spirit is that part of us that connects with the Holy Spirit once we have been “born again” to use Jesus term from John 3.

Give that worldview, my personal vision includes my body, soul and spirit. I am fifty-nine years old, which means my vision for my body is different than it was when I was nineteen, or thirty-nine. I will never again run a five minute mile (or a seven minute mile for that matter.), but far too many folks in their fifties, sixties and beyond assume their bodies will be unable to function well. I have struggled all of my adult life with maintaining the fitness level that is possible for one of my age. That’s because I have sometimes forgotten to establish and clear vision, and at other times to follow through with my plan to attain and maintain that vision.

A number of years ago, I read a book titled Younger Next Year. The book transformed my vision for my body, because it offered seven simple, not easy, but simple habits, which if maintained would keep a person in their fifties and beyond healthy and functioning well physically. Having incorporated the premise of the book into my personal vision and having carried the plan out to lesser and greater degrees over time, I know the book’s premise is sound. Do you have a vision for your body?

When it comes to the soul–the mind, the emotions and the will–this is where the rubber meets the road when it comes to a personal vision. We must engage the mind, emotions and will in order to establish any kind of vision, and to carry the vision into practice. I have often “seen” a vision of a preferred future both personally and corporately quite clearly with my mind. I have been on board with it emotionally. I have become my own best cheerleader. But the will has not cooperated. It will be too hard, or too boring or too ________. Because all of us operate out of a state of fallenness or sin, even once we have been redeemed by Jesus Christ, we will struggle to a greater or lesser degree with getting our mind, emotions and will on board with a godly personal or corporate vision for our lives, but it is essential that we do.

The spirit is crucial when it comes both to formulating and carry out our personal vision, because aside from the Spirit of God connecting with our spirits to develop a godly vision and empowering us to living it out, we will always be struggling and battling at the level of the soul. The good news is our bodies will follow wherever our spirits or souls take them, so we need to ensure only that we give the Holy Spirit control of our spirits in order to win the battle of formulating and living out our personal and corporate visions. It still won’t be easy, because our souls will often fight against what’s best for us, because what’s best for us is seldom easy at first.

When it comes to formulating and living out a clear, compelling and godly personal vision, we must hear from God by reading His word, by listening in prayer, by considering our circumstances and by listening to others who hear from God and speak into our lives, and then we must commit to carrying out that vision in the power of the Holy Spirit. If you ever want to see an example of someone who had a great personal vision, but was ineffective at living it out until he gave the Holy Spirit charge over his life, look at the biblical character known as Simon Peter. Before, he received the Holy Spirit in his life, he was clear and bold about his vision. He was going to follow Jesus whatever that meant. He would preach, teach, heal and cast out demons in Jesus’ name. He had more than a modicum of success, too.

Then Jesus was arrested, and it looked like Peter would also be arrested. In that moment of trial, Peter denied three times that he knew or had even met Jesus. The experience devastated Peter. But after Jesus’ resurrection and return to heaven, Jesus sent the Holy Spirit to the believers, including Peter. When we read the account of the turnaround in Peter’s life in Acts chapters 2-10 it is incredible. The vision is the same, but the ability to carry it out is multiplied.

I recognize some who read these posts may not believe in God, or may not believe that Jesus Christ is God, or that there is a Holy Spirit or even that we have a spirit. You may certainly develop a personal vision and implement it in the power of your mind, emotions and will. Many have done so and have accomplished great things. In my experience, the ability to do great things is within human capacity. What I am writing here is to demonstrate that the greatest things personally and corporately are accomplished when divine capacity is added to human capacity through the Holy Spirit. My hope and prayer is that all of us who are Jesus’ followers will let His Spirit work as we formulate and live out our personal and corporate visions.

I also hope and pray those of you who read this who are not Jesus’ followers will consider what I’m writing and take the step of faith necessary to trust Jesus as your Savior and Lord and let His Spirit work in your spirit as you formulate and live out your personal and corporate visions, too. That will give you the greatest opportunity to develop and live visions that matter both for this life and for eternity.

Here’s to leading better by letting the Holy Spirit work in our spirits as we formulate and live out our personal and corporate visions–today!